Week 18 - Clinically Insane I'm Sure

Taken minutes apart, totally different looking belly

Quick Recap: Mood swings are back. 10lbs up. All maternity clothes all the time. Baby is crazy active before bed. Skin is the best its been, and yet my doctor notices the acne for the first time!? WTF


Peanut's Progression: Almost 6 inches long. 6.5 ounces (about the weight of a chicken breast). Bones are hardening. Can yawn now. Nerves are making connections especially the senses (seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and touching)


You Sure I'm Not Clinically Insane?

When looking up insane and irrational in the dictionary my face is now officially pictured beside the definition. The majority of this week was "normal" but my moments of insanity were off the charts.

I dare you to try and find logic in these two instances: 

1) I woke up stiff from sleeping in one spot too long. Even after shifting to the other side I was uncomfortable. So what do I do? Almost burst into tears because its the worst thing ever! WHY OH WHY at 28 years old do my hips ache like I'm 80!? And WHY is Steve taking up 40% of the bed! I mean talk about a bed hog! And this damn body pillow! Could it take up any more real estate? Wait, no. I'm sorry pillow, I love you. Oh and Steve... yes I love Steve too. Cooper (our cat) thinks this is a perfect time to walk up and stand on my sore hip. I'm immediately even more upset until moments later I realize it is actually helping. Smart kitty.

2) After a normal shift at work, no annoying callers, no major mistakes, I head home and the moment I walk in the door everything begins to irritate me. Like EVERYTHING! My internal thoughts included (but are not limited to) "why are the boys home right now" "No, why is he leaving me to go to the gym" "what is wrong with this water" "could these 5 minute fries cook any slower" "SHUT UP fire alarm! I'm NOT burning dinner" "Where is the hammer, this fire alarm must die"

Yet Another New Name 

In the past week our little babe has become very active and strong! Without fail, during my shifts at work I will feel little shifts and kicks here and there. Then at night, as soon as the lights go out, it's party time! All that wiggling has brought on a new nick name... Wiggles!

Tuesday night Wiggles was particularly wiggly (notably after 2 bowls of gelato). 10 minutes of constant kicking, punching and back flips. I could feel the movements in so many places I have actually started to worry there is a party of two in there.... Oh... My... Gawd... That will be a whole new level of freakout if we find out its twins. But it couldn't be. Right!? I mean there are no twins in our families. The 1st ultrasound only showed one baby. Our doctor has only ever found one heart beat... Right!? It can't be twins RIGHT!? Please someone talk me down from this ledge!

Most Magical Sound

I caught the baby's kick on video this week and although I share A LOT on social media, I also think we share too much. Too many intimate moments become public moments and lose their "specialness". So with that being sad, I've decided not to share the baby kick video. That is a special moment for only those closest to me.

However!!! I do want to share with you the "whomp whomp whomp" sound I described in Week 13. It's not super clear but you can hear the heartbeat behind the clicking noises. Ahhh I've listened to this clip too many times to count, just the most amazing thing!



2 weeks to the halfway mark and only days till we get to see our lil wiggles again!

The Best Pregnancy Apps

From the moment I found out I was pregnant I began feverishly downloading apps and then deleting them because I didn't like them or they weren't very functional. I have an Android phone so there may be other apps that are awesome and only on iPhone but here are the ones I've tried, best to worst:



1) Baby Bump

Very easy to navigate. Gives you daily tips (even some for Dads). Weekly update includes your body, your baby and a health tip. Good message board/community features. You can upload a baby bump photo each week and it creates a separate album in your phone. Has a daily journal feature where you can track weight, cravings, mood, energy appetite etc. Looks nice too.










2) Baby Center

Calendar looks like a schedule allowing you to skip ahead or go back to previous tips. Weekly updates include interactive photos. Every couple of weeks there is also a video showing what your baby is doing inside. It has a checklist of things you should do ie- doctors appointment, do pelvic floor exercises etc. Does not have a photo upload feature.










3) What to Expect Pregnancy Tracker

Basically a mobile version of the book. Each weekly update includes the exact excerpt from the book. Nice simple home screen. Easy to navigate. Weekly update shows what dates you are in a certain week ( I like this for future planning, ie- how far along will I be at Christmas). Does have a photo upload but I haven't used it (I prefer my Baby Bump). Pretty basic. No extra frills. Good information though.










4) I'm Expecting

Gives you good information but seems to be off when telling you what week you are in. Most give you the week you are entering (ie- you are 17 weeks therefore you are entering week 18), this leaves you in the week you have completed. No daily tips. No photo upload. Does give you the option to enter doctor information and symptoms.










 
5) Happy Pregnancy

Very cheap looking. I think the dates are off slightly when it comes to trimesters. Baby image is even worse than Pregly. Weekly information is limited. Random facts are not related to your stage of pregnancy. Does have a neat weight feature, shows where you should be at for weight gain for your week.  Includes a contraction timer. A very basic journal.










6) Pregly

Very budget looking. Image of baby is just a pencil drawn cartoon essentially. Limited information in your weekly update. Tips/Facts are random and not associated to your stage of pregnancy. Baby name function is just a massive list of names. No way to sort or select names, kind of useless.

Week 17 - I Finally Gave In...

Quick Recap: Nothing major to report this week. Stable moods. Skin is decent. Up 6lbs from pre-pregnancy weight. No dizziness. Back in the gym. Feel like my usual self.

Peanut's Progression: 5 inches long. Weighs 5 ounces. Hiccuping. Forming some baby fat. Eyes are in the right spot. Practicing sucking. Fingerprints will form in the next week :)

New name for "Peanut":

For the past few months Steve and I have been calling our lil bundle of joy "Peanut". Well that name has overstayed its welcome. We tossed around a few ideas before coming to the final conclusion. Our roomie suggested "Corn Nut" because the baby has functioning ears now. Get it? Ears... Corn...

Then he suggested "Peanut Butter" so in the 3rd trimester we could call it "Peanut Butter Cup". His logic is actually pretty smart however it doesn't solve the problem that "Peanut" has been overused. So I went on a Google mission and found a lot of name nicknames, like "Frank" or "Maude". Didn't love that idea because we won't know if its a boy or girl. Randomly one morning Steve said "what about minion?!" It's already gotten its fair share of negative response (especially from my Mom who refuses to say it). In our mind it's a reference to the adorable yellow dudes from Despicable Me that I'm in love with.

Maternity Clothes

WHY did I ever fight this!? Maternity jeans (or as I also like to call them, "eating pants") are only the best invention EVER! I went to a great consignment sale in Vancouver and picked up a great pair of full panel maternity jeans for $17.50. They look brand new! So much so that the blue dye still bleeds on my fingers and socks.

As for other clothing finds, I picked up a belly band for $5 to hopefully extend the life of my non-maternity jeans and a great dress that will also work post pregnancy with some slight alterations.

After having a minor breakdown while staring at my closet and exclaiming "I have nothing to wear!" we made a trip to Old Navy for a few basics. I picked up the following items and LOVE them all $100 well spent.

Full panel leggings in dark grey
Polka dot sweater in navy
Cowl neck sweater in black and silver
Ruched tank in white, navy and grey

Baby on a Budget

The single biggest fear when it comes to having a baby (at least for me) is how in the world we will every pay for it all. I work part-time and do not get any top up benefits from work. I will be bringing in EI only. I've supported myself without any help from others since I moved out at 20 and the idea of having to rely on Steve as the income earner is tough. I don't want him to resent my inability to contribute an equal amount to the household. Nor do I want him to feel pressured to make more money and be away at work more.

When I really sit back and think about it, we are not in a dire situation by any means and somehow everyone makes it work, no matter how much or little money you have. I remind myself that babies need love more than anything, not a fancy crib or the trendiest stroller. They don't care and will never remember.

I am so amazed at the generosity of others! Some close friends have offered to share items with me which is amazing but the part that really surprised me is how people whom I haven't spoken to in 10 years are willing to fill my car with whatever items I could possibly need. It's as though every Mom and Dad out there remember being overwhelmed by the idea of providing for a child and want to make it as easy as possible for others.

So a HUGE (note the appropriate use of this word, not related to weight ;) ) thank you to each and every person who has given or lent us items already and may in future. My heart really is overflowing with joy and love and gratitude.


If you haven't had a chance to answer my "Belly Bets" questionnaire, check it out here. Have your say if you think its a boy or girl. When I'll give birth. How many hours of labour. Etc etc etc.

Now Taking Belly Bets!!!

I'll post updated predictions on a weekly basis... So far its 61% Girl... 

Here are some common wives tales and where I fit in to help you :)

Heart rate: 
Above 140bpm = Girl. Below 140bpm = Boy. 
My baby was 151 last appointment.

Shape of Belly:
If you are carrying high with a big, round belly, you are having a girl. If you are carrying low with a smaller belly that sticks straight out, it’s a boy. 
I am carrying low and its as though I swallowed a basketball.


Acne:
If you have acne while pregnant, it’s a girl. It’s thought that acne during pregnancy is caused by the extra hormones.  
I've had terrible acne the whole time

Cravings:
People believe that if you are craving salty foods while pregnant, you can count on having a boy. If you crave sweets, fruit, and orange juice, you are having a little girl.  
All I can say is sour keys and apples...


Mom’s Beauty:
It is said that the girl “steals” the mother’s beauty. If you think that pregnancy has never made you look more beautiful, a little boy it is.
This one is up to you to decide

Side You Most Rest On:
If a pregnant woman prefers to lay on her left side, she’s having a boy. If she prefers resting on her right side, she’s having a girl.
I sleep on my back (cleared by my doc) and right side

Dad’s Weight Gain:
If the dad-to-be gains weight while you are pregnant, it’s a girl. If he doesn’t gain weight, you’re having a boy.
Steve is still at his pre-pregnancy weight... lol

Morning Sickness:
If you had a smooth pregnancy with no morning sickness, it’s a boy. If you were sick or felt really nauseous during your pregnancy, count on a girl.
I was nauseous but never sick

Protein:
When a pregnant woman craves meat and cheese, count on a boy.
Love me some cheese and steak, aversions to all other meat though.

Feet:
Are your feet colder now that you are pregnant? If so, you just might be having a boy. If your feet have stayed the same before pregnancy and during, you’re having a little girl
My tootsies are colder

Headaches:
If you are having headaches, you might be carrying a boy 
Yep, roger that on the headaches

 

Survey hosted by Surveylyzer

Week 16: Fat jokes ALREADY!?

OMG OMG OMG this cannot wait for its own section!

I can feel our little miracle move! Last week at yoga (which was much better this time around btw) my Mom told me she felt me move around 16 weeks. I thought it was going to take much longer so I quickly became OBSESSED with feeling the baby flutters. I poked my belly intentionally to try and make Peanut wiggle just so I could see if I can feel it.

A few nights during the week I thought I felt some new movements/feelings but wasn't always sure. Then after the gym I DEFINITELY felt it! I was driving home and felt a distinct long flutter in my abdomen, too low to be mistaken for tummy gurgles. Wow! I mean he/she must have been doing a backflip it felt so neat! Ahhh just typing this makes me so excited to feel that little flutter again! Amazing!

***NEW FEATURE*** 
Peanut's Progression: About 4.5 inches long (from head to bum). Weighs about 3 ounces. Ears are functioning, meaning he/she can hear my terrible singing. Has eyebrows and eye lashes.

Quick Recap: Still occasional headaches. Pants are getting tight. Nasal congestion. Back in the gym! Much less moody.


Fat jokes... ALREADY!?!:

Part of me didn't want to post this as it seems to just attract the attention the poster was looking for but it's also a super common problem for pregnant women and it deserves a discussion.

This week I posted the photo on the left on my Facebook page and it got this comment from a man "OMG you are huge! We should get you a country radio station and call you big rig"

WTF is wrong with you. That is a joke!? Weight is already an issue for almost every woman out there and now you want to tell a pregnant one who isn't even half way through that she is huge?! Fuck you. And to top it off, after telling him that it is a terrible thing to say to a pregnant woman, he tells me to "calm your hormones".

Too many friends have shared with me the "big" "huge" "large" comments men (I'm sure women have done it too) have made directly to them during their pregnancy.  Do NOT by any means describe a pregnant woman using an adjective that could mean big, ever. Instead stick with the safe and polite comment "Congratulations! You look great!" Done and done, everyone leaves the situation happy and you can comment to your friends later about how you think she looks like a blimp.

Although the commenter on my Facebook page would never know, his timing was actually terrible which brings me to the next topic....

Gym insecurities:

The same day that "big rig" comment was made I had my first gym workout since my belly has popped and my dizziness has subsided. It was good and bad. Good because I finally had energy to get through a whole workout without being lightheaded or really out of breath, and I even had energy for the rest of the day. Bad because it brought up a whole new level of body issues. Hence why the fat joke was really bad timing.

When I got pregnant I was at my physical fitness peak. I was the girl in the gym that could lift with the boys. When at my ladies only gym, I used the heaviest available weights and was proud of it, in fact sometimes frustrated that I didn't have access to heavier weights. First world problems, I know. So, instead of flashing my toned legs in shorts, and my flat abs in a tight tank, I wore my comfy and stretched out Lululemons, a t-shirt and a hoodie.

It was a strange battle in my mind, at first I was excited to show off my bump but then it halted with the thought that other people may not know its a baby. Maybe they think I'm at the gym because I love donuts too much. These thoughts only got worse as I found myself unable to push myself physically. I was the lazy girl at the gym, who wasn't working hard enough to see results. I made every effort to push my tummy out more to make it CLEAR it was a tiny human miracle and not a Krispy Kreme... or 10.

Thankfully these thoughts don't arise on many occasions but it sure showed me how much insecurity I really do have and how tough this process really can be. It's not just the realizations that you are going to be a Mom (which in itself is more than enough to handle) but its also coping with your physical changes and accepting your new body for the miraculous human growing machine that it is.


I'm aware that this weeks entry wasn't the most upbeat with the negative weight comment and my insecurities at the gym but I suppose in a way it reflects the true nature of pregnancy. One minute you are on top of the world and the very next moment one simple thing can ruin that feeling. A happy week 17 here we come!

Week 15: I Am One Moody Foodie!

One of many future prego selfies

You know whats amazing about being pregnant? The love and support you receive from other pregnant women and Moms. There is a lot of judgement amongst women but I'm learning quickly there is MORE love! A big thank you to everyone who has sent a supportive and caring message to me. I so appreciate you taking the time to read my blog and send me loving messages about your experiences and your words of support through the tougher days.

Quick Recap: Bump is back, and I'm starting to love it. Energetic but moody. Still rockin some acne but not nearly as bad. Abs are officially MIA.

Peanut's Progression: About 3.5 - 4 inches long. About 2.5 ounces in weight. Praciting breathing and sucking.  Kicking and wiggling around. Ears are in the right spot.


I'm a proverbial swing set, moooody!

Holy wow am I ever moody! Tuesday: every word out of anyones mouth made me irritated and I was very easily frustrated. Wednesday: LOVING life. Happiest person ever. Loved my bump and dressed it up accordingly (see photo) but then on the way home from work I spent the whole car ride in a full fledged ugly cry listening to my Luke Bryan album. Thursday: wake up feeling playful but it quickly slides downhill when I eat my PB and toast, "WHY do I need to chew this bite 500 times just to swallow it!? I don't have time for this!!!" Yep, that was my actual thought process. Thankfully I have the most patient and supportive partner ever! He never stoops to my crazy level, instead he just speaks calmly and lets me have my moment of insanity praying it will pass soon.

Food!!! Oh how I love thee!

HELLOOO appetite! YES! Finally, I have my normal appetite back, I'm not talking quantities, I'm talking variety. I'm back to having complete meals with protein, veggies and whole grains. I'm glad to know the apps were right when they said you will make up for lack of nutrition later on in pregnancy when your morning sickness subsides. Oddly enough I can walk past the candy aisle and the sour keys no problem now.

Yoga

Anyone who knows me knows I'm a huge lover of yoga. I try to practice regularly and love to challenge myself with new inversions, like these. Being pregnant means you need to adjust your practice. Things like the direction you twist and avoiding work on your stomach are the most common adjustments. For me, I can no longer perform back bends the way I used to. It's as though my abs seize and I can only stretch about 1/3 of the way. Gone are the days of bribing Steven to take endless photos or video of me being bendy.

I'm having to really shift my expectations for my yoga classes, and in fact do what the teachers always tell you to "just be, don't have any expectations". I find myself frustrated after class because I can't do things the way I used to. Thursday nights are now officially my yoga night with Mom so tonight I will be practicing acceptance of my new capabilities. 

Colostrum

For you sensitive folk that don't enjoy my "tell it like it is approach" to the physical changes occurring you can stop reading now. Consider yourself warned.

I was shocked to read in my apps that around week 14 my baby feeders would start producing colostrum. All I could think was "Wow! This soon?" and then it was immediately followed by "Hmmm I wonder if I just...." Yup, if you say I can do something you better believe I'm going to try. Sure enough during a nice warm bath I managed to express some. My face must have been priceless. They work! They totally work!!!

Of course I couldn't keep this news to myself, I text one of my close Mom friends and she had a good laugh with me. Then when Steve came home I prefaced my comment with "You're going to think I'm weird but...". The best part was his reaction. He high fived me and exclaimed "Right on! Atta girl!" HAHA


Anxiously awaiting that first flutter of movement and counting down to the half way mark... 5 weeks left

I'm turning into THAT Mom...

Peanut isn't even here yet and I'm already turning into THAT Mom...

You know the one, finds the inappropriate in everything! Perfect example is Lady Gaga's new song "Do What You Want". I was listening to it on the way to work and started thinking how in the world would I explain this song to my son or daughter. "Do what you want to my body" Are you kidding me!? WTF Gaga.

As a radio personality, controversial songs are nothing new to me but my perspective on them has changed overnight. I used to think these songs weren't really a big deal but now I picture my little girl singing along to them and I'm kinda horrified.

As the voice of reason for your child, how do you help them understand these sort of songs and how do you guide them in the right direction?!?!?!

PS - If I ever become the Mom who comments on multiple Facebook posts all up in arms over nothing, someone please slap me.